Me-he-he-helanie,
What can the problem be?
Sweet Me-he-he-he-helanie,
Why won't you go out with me?

She lived across the street on the fifteenth floor of the Gilmore building.
I saw her in the shower reaching for some soap.
I knew she had to be the girl for me, and to think I probably
never would have found her,
If I hadn't bought that telescope.

Me-he-he-helanie,
What can the problem be?
Sweet Me-he-he-he-helanie,
Why won't you go out with me?

I just can't understand it.
Why won't you return my phone calls?
Are you still mad I gave a mohawk to your cat?
If you'd just say the word, I'm certain that our love would last
forever and ever,
Or are you too dumb to realize that?

Me-he-he-helanie,
What can the problem be?
Sweet Me-he-he-he-helanie,
Why won't you go out with me?

How can you ignore me, when you know that I can't live without you?
I have to go through your garbage just to learn more about you.
Melanie,
Oh sweet Me-he-he-helanie,
Why won't you go out with me?

You weren't impressed when I tattooed your name across my forehead.
You wouldn't listen when I promised to be true.
I couldn't stand it, so I jumped out from the sixteenth story
window right above you.
Now I may be dead but I still love you.

Me-he-he-helanie,
What can the problem be?
Sweet Me-he-he-he-helanie,
Why won't you go out with me?