Announcer: Please rise for the Grouch Anthem.

Oscar: No, no, no. For the Grouch Anthem, you stay sitting down. Down in front there! Now brace yourself, I'm gonna sing:

Grouches of the world unite!
Stand up for your grouchly rights!
Don't let the sunshine spoil the rain
Just stand up and complain (heheheh)

Let this be the grouches' cause:
Point out everybody's flaws!
Something is wrong with everything
Except the way I sing!

(Cue Grouch Choir ooing in the background)

Spoken:
You know what's right with this world? Nuttin!
You know what gets me hot under the collar? You name it!
And the next time some goody-two-shoes smiles and tells you to have a nice day, just remember:

Sung:
Don't let the sunshine spoil the rain,
Just stand up and complain!
Just stand up and complain!