Welcome to my breakfast table this is what you'll find

A different kind of breakfast food that leaves the real ones far behind

What's the fucking deal, all these brand names all around

They raise the prices, raise my rent, but do not make a sound



Now I'm getting older these changes in my life

It's the Quaker man he's the one I give my hand

He's the one who picks my wife for me

I think that he is God

You know it's true

He's the one who picks my wife for me



Jesus Christ, Holy shit, now what's the fucking deal?

How the Hell should I go on if there's no more sex appeal

I give you flakes

I give you puffs of corn right off the shelf

I know you never thought of that

I know you never thought of it



Stand in line for oats today.